100. I KNEW it!

I was saving 100 for the celebratory entry: all finished (more or less). Certainly no more visits to St James’s till 15 July. So here’s my muted celebration:

Not the most flattering picture. Andy Warhol wearing my clothes or Jan with a false smile and gritted teeth!

This is the notorious bell. The verse says:

Ring this bell

Three times well

Its toll to clearly say

My treatment’s done

This course is run

And I am on my way!  (Very Yorkshire)

Only I’m not on my way after all. I was anticipating a few hospital-free weeks till the zolendrate IV mid-July but the nurse wasn’t happy about my gruff voice and my admission that food has started to stick in my throat sometimes. Radiotherapy or neuropathy? She checked with Dr D and she wants to see me at the breast clinic on Friday to check it out. I don’t feel it’s necessary but I can understand they want to check everything out - but that’s why I said false smile and gritted teeth. Back to the hospital in the same week! I’d rather see Dr U - he’s more amenable than Dr D and explains things in greater detail.

While waiting to see the nurse, Lisa and I browsed through the pamphlets. They must have been low on stock when Den and I looked before because there were plenty I wanted to pick up, things I could have done with months ago. Why isn’t the leaflet on chemotherapy available in the oncology treatment area?? Makes no sense, except it’s so cramped, there probably is no room. We were approached by one of the support staff and I learnt that I’ve missed out on all sorts of things. No one mentioned I was entitled to 6 free treatments at the Robert Ogden Centre (and my carer too). I knew about the cosmetics and skincare session you have to book but have felt too weak and feeble and wouldn’t want to ask anyone for a further favour of a lift. However it seems I’m still entitled so, as soon as I can drive again, I’ll maybe follow it up. A bit late now my lashes and eyebrows are regrowing but a nice big bag of freebies is not to be dismissed out of hand. I wonder if I missed all this because of the transition from the private to the public sector? I don’t recall having a pre-assessment when it would have been covered. Perhaps it was because all of us were focused on the mental health aspect and trying to get me to accept chemotherapy.

The nurse was lovely and kept reminding me of how much I’ve achieved. For once, I didnt find it patronising!

Meantime, the Easter egg barely tastes. It needs more time to mature perhaps - or I need more time to get my tastebuds back. Oh Dairy Milk, how I miss you.